Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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