singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize