You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
