At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
