I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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