Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
