This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
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She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
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Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize