Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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