So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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