she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
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I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
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