Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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