he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I can't put those talents on a resume
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
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