Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
We are all done wearing pants today
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
