it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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