I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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