My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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