there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize