Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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