I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
