would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
