Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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