Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
