But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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