just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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