Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Success! We fucked roommates!
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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