How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
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