Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
