I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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