you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
there is puke in my bra ... again
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
