VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
