hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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