I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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