Three words: puerto rican gang bang
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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