I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
