Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
