After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
