I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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