I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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