A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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