Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
