at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
My pussy is not your playground.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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