I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I still have a little drunk in my system
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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