i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize