pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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