I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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