Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
