and you said cock pushups were impossible
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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