and i looked up. we had an audience...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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