the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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