I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
